you are not (only) made of stardust

while you are made of stardust,
in addition, you are
tempered by disappointments
resilient when you forge ahead
humbled by past failures
& stronger when you try again.
you are not (only) made of stardust —
you are more than you could imagine.

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someday, you’ll see

someday, you’ll see there’s a (vast) difference between
teaching one’s child how to make good decisions
& insisting your way is the (only) correct path.
someday, you’ll realize that I’m not rebellious,
(adults don’t rebel; they act on their own accord).
someday, you’ll see that you removed yourself from my life
by (constantly) criticizing everything that garnered your disapproval.
someday, you’ll realize that love is (truly) unconditional
(not contingent on being who someone wants you to be).
despite your insistence that I’m nothing without you,
I’ve never been more certain that I’m becoming
the woman I needed as a role model, but got you instead.

thirteen things no one tells you (& you learn for yourself)

1. you should strive to be good, not unique. (contrary to their name, special snowflakes are everywhere. genuine people aren’t.)
2. once you discover that home is a feeling, not a location, your restlessness dissipates. (you won’t find a reason to plan your next escape.)
3. when you fall in love, your badass armor will crumble. (you will embrace your softness.)
4. it is okay that your parents like you less as each day passes. (they hate everything about you that doesn’t fit their idea of who you should be.)
5. trust your first impressions of everyone you meet. (your bullshit detector gets better as you get older.)
6. do not let people bend your empathetic ear if they can’t reciprocate. (you’re no one’s crutch.)
7. you will tire of the friends who lament about missing you on social media yet don’t keep in touch. (letting them go is easier than you thought.)
8. when someone insults others in order to compliment you, you’re right to be disgusted. (& to decline the intended compliment.)
9. happiness isn’t a constant state. (even the best days have comparatively low points.)
10. your weekend ritual of binge drinking will get boring. (if it doesn’t, your abysmal hangover recovery time will deter you from continuing the tradition.)
11. everything turns out the way it should. (though you won’t see the reason immediately.)
12. you are resilient. (you will bounce back from disappointments quickly because you can’t afford to waste time dwelling.)
13. when you hold yourself (solely) to your own expectations, you will like the person you become. (you may even love her.)

Reminders to help you live a happier life

Slow down & don’t spread yourself too thin.
There’s a fine line between efficiency and doing too much. Never take on more than you can accomplish. Learn to prioritize what needs to be done, so you can do each well. At the end of the day, you should be ready for rest but not completely drained.

Embrace the positive.
Don’t bemoan the things that don’t go your way. Don’t get stuck in a rut from the daily work/school grind. Instead of getting bogged down by what goes wrong, embrace the positive. Consider what goes right in your day and focus on that.

Let go of toxic people & surround yourself with supportive people.
Stay away from toxic, joyless people. Being around those who constantly complain will bring you down. Don’t put up with people who belittle and degrade you. It’s difficult when family members or former close friends are toxic people, but remember — you’re entitled to be happy on your own terms. Build a support system of people who can handle what life throws their way and who will help you do the same.

Be thankful.
When your alarm starts ringing, it’s natural to dread getting out of bed. Rather than begging your significant other to let you sleep for five more minutes (as I do, most days), be thankful that you woke up to a new day. Be grateful for the awesome people and opportunities in your life.

Enjoy every moment.